sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
