have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
