Texts From Last Night

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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!

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  (902): It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time! http://tfl.nu/2h7j
  Replies (12) Good night (885) Bad night (3630)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  FIrst one done

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  How did it go?

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"

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  (440): FIrst one done (609): How did it go? (440): I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c" http://tfl.nu/mm29
  Replies (9) Good night (3533) Bad night (853)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god

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  (304): Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god http://tfl.nu/7ezr
  Replies (21) Good night (6415) Bad night (875)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers

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  (650): Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers http://tfl.nu/4ij8
  Replies (64) Good night (9182) Bad night (1002)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.

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  (818): I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got. http://tfl.nu/vmp4
  Replies (27) Good night (1805) Bad night (5808)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10

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  (559): Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10 http://tfl.nu/1xln
  Replies (13) Good night (7119) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.

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  (740): It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex. http://tfl.nu/8qyg
  Replies (18) Good night (1093) Bad night (4819)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.

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  (202): you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry. http://tfl.nu/e7cu
  Replies (9) Good night (7477) Bad night (1163)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up

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  (773): once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up http://tfl.nu/esy3
  Replies (5) Good night (2791) Bad night (733)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.

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  (865): Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america. http://tfl.nu/zhnq
  Replies (6) Good night (1810) Bad night (1625)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter

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  (732): he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter http://tfl.nu/lu6b
  Replies (5) Good night (983) Bad night (2111)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.

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  (412): Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant. http://tfl.nu/1w7r
  Replies (16) Good night (1547) Bad night (1062)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.

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  (812): She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila. http://tfl.nu/arvl
  Replies (5) Good night (2767) Bad night (1147)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.

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  (705): Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap. http://tfl.nu/psf5
  Replies (7) Good night (817) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat

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  (240): How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat http://tfl.nu/bfcr
  Replies (4) Good night (502) Bad night (603)

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