Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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