I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
