yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize