He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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