What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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