I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
