She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
