Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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