Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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