pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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