How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Randomize
