Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(831): View more from California

I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.

(1-831): View more from California

stop. you already have a dog

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(831): I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company. (1-831): stop. you already have a dog http://tfl.nu/bxqv

Replies (8) Good night (938) Bad night (1814)
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(404): View more from Georgia

hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??

(1-404): View more from Georgia

no.

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(404): hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer?? (1-404): no. http://tfl.nu/c4dk

Replies (21) Good night (6367) Bad night (688)
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(210): View more from Texas

He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.

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(210): He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax. http://tfl.nu/uaku

Replies (14) Good night (1188) Bad night (7737)
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(770): View more from Georgia

i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.

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(770): i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises. http://tfl.nu/q0zn

Replies (52) Good night (6614) Bad night (1664)
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(03): View more from

you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!

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(03): you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!! http://tfl.nu/e67e

Replies (18) Good night (6936) Bad night (998)
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(636): View more from Missouri

I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.

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(636): I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle. http://tfl.nu/niba

Replies (6) Good night (2220) Bad night (758)
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(863): View more from Florida

It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.

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(863): It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job. http://tfl.nu/q4uy

Replies (9) Good night (2318) Bad night (714)
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(818): View more from California

I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.

(805): View more from California

What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.

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(818): I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated. (805): What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes. http://tfl.nu/bk6e

Replies (6) Good night (2890) Bad night (785)
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(574): View more from Indiana

should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?

(1-574): View more from Indiana

meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?

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(574): should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band? (1-574): meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis? http://tfl.nu/hzbs

Replies (8) Good night (1974) Bad night (559)
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(541): View more from Oregon

I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.

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(541): I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar. http://tfl.nu/9erd

Replies (4) Good night (2006) Bad night (472)
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(801): View more from Utah

Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.

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(801): Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day. http://tfl.nu/wa25

Replies (7) Good night (554) Bad night (1298)
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(650): View more from California

I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"

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(650): I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun" http://tfl.nu/k4ww

Replies (9) Good night (1649) Bad night (741)
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(425): View more from Washington

I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge

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(425): I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge http://tfl.nu/ss4f

Replies (5) Good night (1112) Bad night (319)
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(303): View more from Colorado

Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.

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(303): Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package. http://tfl.nu/50h2

Replies (3) Good night (856) Bad night (332)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.

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(614): I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely. http://tfl.nu/lx5s

Replies (7) Good night (201) Bad night (709)

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