pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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