remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
