We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I just had sex on a roof
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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