Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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