Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I had to cum in my sink.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
