I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize