I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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