adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
These tits shall not be calmed
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
