We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
