My nipple is on Facebook.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize