Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
