My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
