ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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