I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
