I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
