what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize