im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize