I met the friendliest cop last night
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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