You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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