Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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