For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
