why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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