Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
