____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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