It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
