also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
