But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
