At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Someone came in the potted fern
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
