Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Brb crying the tears of my youth
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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