He had one of those small greek statue penises
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize