with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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