HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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