I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
so explain again why im purple
no
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
The Olympian is in my bed
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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