If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize