Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
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since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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