I need help removing her.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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