Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
